Should you quit your job to be a stay-at-home mom? The main reason I feel so guilty for working when I could be parenting is that my child is right there. I know when he is misbehaving in another room and boy do I want to intervene. But I am supposed to be at work, so I try as hard as I can to resist the urge. However, this dereliction of maternal duty often makes me feel terrible.
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Working from home means literally doing my work in my home. There’s no physical separation between my personal and professional life, no clearly set times when I’m “on” and “off” one or the other. I love being able to make my own schedule, but that flexibility is also my downfall. If I’m not strictly disciplined with my time, which is not exactly my strong suit, it’s too easy to blur the lines between work and home. I tend to work in spurts here and there throughout the day and evening, which makes it feel like I’m working all day, even though I only work part-time hours.
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“My mom tried telling me I couldn’t have it all—but as it turns out, it’s possible to have it all but it’s impossible to do it all well,” says Meredith C. Carroll, 45, a Colorado-based freelance writer who’s written about her WAHM challenges. Carroll has two daughters, ages seven and 10. As a WAHM, Carroll felt she missed much of her eldest daughter’s early childhood, so she stayed home with her second child to fill in the gaps. “The stuff I missed wasn't necessarily tangible,” she says. “It was more about being emotionally absent in the many small moments that quickly add up.”
Olivia Howell, 33, works in social media management and cares for her two sons, ages two and five, in New York. She works throughout the day, every day, on her phone until around 1:00 A.M. and tries to wake up before her kids. ”I feel so blessed I get to be flexible for my boys,” she says. “But I never have time for myself ever, and I never sleep, like, really.”
Great article, thanks. I’m a Mom of 4, now a hands-on Nanna. Pretty hard to get things done when your kids are small. When my oldest was being bullied at school I desperately needed money to pay for an alternative private school. So I became an ethical dog breeder. Twenty seven years on I’m still doing it and reckon it beats most other options out there hands down.
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